120714 – Incompetence

Have never felt so unfairly treated before. Is it right that an innocent person ends up suffering the brunt of the consequences in a conflict between two parties?

How can a leader at such a high level allow himself to make major organizational decisions based on personal agenda, without regard for logic or consequence? How can someone who is empowered to lead hundreds, have his own inability to manage personal matters allow him to damage the performance (and the lives) of the organization and it’s people?

Rather; how can someone who cannot maintain a fair distance between his personal and professional life, be empowered to lead such an important organization?

Can someone who cannot deal with their own problems, be entrusted to deal with the lives of hundreds of men? Whatever happened to the values of leadership? Of professionalism? I question the quality of the leaders that are chosen.

Nonetheless, letting this bring me down will just drag me to the same level. What needs to be done still needs to be done and I will not let this bind me. Professionalism is the word and if you will not live it out, I will.

On a brighter note, the first week of the Experiencing God series has been fairly fruitful, and timely as well. Feel like God has placed this study in my life here and now for a reason, and it’s definitely brought much purpose and comfort in the recent circumstances. In all things You must be greater; I must become less.

Who knows; I might not have the strength to live out what I just wrote, but I know someone who does.

You’re welcome.




230614 – Refreshed

Not as in “I feel refreshed” (though that is true) but as in I just refreshed this 2 year old site, saved all my posts in another hidden site and decided to give this “proper” blogging thing another shot.

Tomorrow I return to unit life after 5 weeks away. Though I wouldn’t totally call the 4 weeks of Int Spec course a vacation it was definitely a welcome change in environment:

1. Extremely thankful for the opportunity to stay out every day (save 3 where we worked late into the night), despite the distance travelled to reach home.

2. Had lots of fun with the people in syndicate 3, it was a pleasure working with them on all the exercises and also thankful that these guys “were only serious when required”. Being part of a team comprised of so many different ranks, from CPL to MSG working together as equals and as friends, is an experience not many NSFs would get to experience in their service.

3. The things learnt during the course, though I don’t foresee them being particularly applicable in future, helped put some perspective into how the military functions and what my role in this big picture is.

I still wonder why of all the possible positions in company line and Bn HQ even, I was placed on the Int Spec appointment. Probably will never fully understand God’s plan in this, but will always be immensely grateful even if it’s a really messed up place sometimes; there’s no other job I’d rather be doing here.

Look forward to booking in tonight to see the people in in my NS journey that I have come to love the most, no matter how messed up everything is else is I’d still want to go back to them.

Church camp (retreat) 2014 was different, to say the least. Felt like the theme of being still and seeking God was what I needed. Sermons along this line are of course nothing like what would be expected out of a church camp, but the message is something I feel many of us needed to hear.

The 94’s only had 4 people (+Bryan) during this camp; it’s a nice change as well I guess, not only because of the simpler interaction but also because of the opportunity to interact with the younger batches. Feel v old as a result of this camp but realise my heart is still with these people and even after next year they are the ones I want to be serving in ministry.

Simple message, simple song, but felt really blessed by this.

Recently have been trying to sort out for myself the place that music has in worship and how it is possible to use something so possibly worldly and manipulative to facilitate corporate worship. During the retreat God gave me a timely reminder of the countless instances in the bible where we are told to sing in response to the Lord. As worldly as the image of music is today it remains that it is a gift from God to us to worship him with. For the first time I put two and two together; it is a gift God has givenĀ to us, yet it is by nature so manipulative – God has entrusted a lot of power to the musicians who lead his people in worship. Does how we play, then, affect how people respond to God, and did he mean it to be this way? That implies a huge responsibility a musician has, then, towards his craft and consequently towards God and his people. Scary, cool stuff to chew on.

More to come.